To the DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ABUSER and VICTIM, the Potter Loves You

To the DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ABUSER and VICTIM, the Potter loves you

Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. (NIV)

            The first instance of domestic violence that is recorded in the Bible was between Cain and Abel. Two brothers, who were the children of the first married couple in the Bible, were also the first to have a situation within the family that led to the violent death of one of them. Hatred and jealousy filled the heart of Cain where he became so outraged that he killed his own flesh and blood. Hebrews 11:4 By faith Abel brought God a better offering than Cain did. By faith he was commended as righteous, when God spoke well of his offerings. And by faith Abel still speaks, even though he is dead. (NIV) Misplaced anger, envy, lack of self-control, and an attempt to manipulate God into receiving an unacceptable offering gave rise to Cain’s evil ambitions. Needless to say, this act of violence angered God and Cain was exiled from the land with the curse of always being a wanderer and a producer of nothing.

            As in the story of Cain and Abel – Cain being the abuser and Abel the victim, domestic violence never ends well with either party. Someone gets hurt and/or a life destroyed when help from an outside source such as a counselor, pastor, therapist and/or police has not been obtained. The abuser normally feels that he/she has a reason to display such behavior and the victim often feels as if he/she has somehow caused the violent act of which they are the recipient of. Nothing could be further from the truth, however, and violence is never the answer to solving any problem. Many abusers grew up being abused themselves and later became the very abuser they hated, while the victim was likely victimized as a child and carried the passive behavior into adulthood thinking that it was normal. However, it wasn’t and never is.

            Jesus suffered abuse at the hands of the religious leaders and Roman soldiers. He was spit at, slapped, punched, and whipped amongst other things that the prophet Isaiah describes in his writings that were believed to be prophetic of the Lord’s sufferings. Isaiah 50:6 I offered my back to those who beat me, my cheeks to those who pulled out my beard; I did not hide my face from mocking and spitting. (NIV) Despite having gone through this, Jesus did not become the abuser in retaliation for what they did. While hanging on the cross, his dying wish was that of forgiveness. Luke 23:34 Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots. (NIV) Yes, Jesus forgave his abusers and so are we to do the same to anyone who has abused us. This doesn’t mean that you have to keep taking abuse, but the forgiveness is for you to be in righteous standing with the Father.

            Rather you are the abuser or the victim, the Potter offers healing to you. If you are the abuser, at some point in life, you were more than likely victimized by someone with whom you were entrusted to for care and therefore, you are still carrying emotional scars. If you are the victim, you may feel that you are unworthy of the love that you deserve. The enemy has sought to destroy both of your lives, but it is up to you to either continue down the same path or allow the Potter to help you get on track towards restoration. You can’t do it alone. Therefore, the Potter is the One who can help you, but He also gives earthly resources that can aid in your recovery regardless with which end of the spectrum you’re on.  Philippian 2:4 Not looking to your own interest but each of you to the interest of the others. (NIV)

            If you are the abuser, allow the Potter to help you replace your anger with His abundant love. Also, get assistance from others who can guide you both spiritually and emotionally. Help is available from the Potter, but first you have to put forth the effort to allow Him to change you from the inside out. Philippian 2:5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus. (NIV)

            Should you find yourself being on the receiving end of abuse, the Potter has much better in store for you. Ask Him to safely lead you out of the situation until help is received by the responsible party and allow Him to work on YOU. Rather male or female, no one has the right to abuse you verbally, emotionally nor physically. You are a child of the King and as the Potter’s special vessel, you are to be treated as such. 1 Peter 2:9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. (NIV) Allow for the Potter’s guidance in building healthy relationships and to give you a great support system that will aid in your recovery to change you from a victim to a victor. At the Potter’s House, He makes the impossible possible and all who are broken will be made whole. 1 Thessalonians 5:23 May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. (NIV)